Banana
If you're feeling stressed, take some time to yourself and lie facedown in the street for a few hours.
Mushroom
If you feel like you just need a boost this week, try eating all that leftover Halloween candy from last year.
POW Block
Compensate for your own lack of stability by disrupting the lives of everyone around you.
Fake Item Box
Things are not always as they seem, so you really should have questioned why someone would leave a "candy bar" in your bathtub.
Star
A sparkling determination allows you to over come any obstacle - including that person crossing the street last night.
Bob-Omb
You'll finally understand the phrase "Timing is everything" when the crack about your boss's spouse kills with your co-workers but totally bombs with your nearby boss.
Green Shell
Your aimlessness in life is matched only by your love of bagel bites and Japanese animes.
Giant Mushroom
Your attempts to lose weight will be unsuccessful, but your reward is the power to crush all who oppose you.
Super Leaf
Your frantic efforts to succeed won't be dampened by the fact that they have literally no effect.
Blooper
What better way to distract from your lack of social skills than a black, inky, discharge from your butt?
Thunder Cloud
Don't mistake an electric urge to get as far away from you as possible for sparks flying between you and a special someone.
Fire Flower
Maybe a mass email with the subject line "HIRE ME PLEASE" sent to everyone on your contact list wasn't the best way to search for a job.
Triple Green Shell
For you, three opportunities just means three chances to fail.
Red Shell
If you feel like you're being followed you probably are, so it's best to run everywhere in a zig-zag pattern.
Triple Bananas
You did not accomplish much in this life, so secure your legacy by making sure life is just as terrible for all those who come after you.
Thunder Bolt
If you're feeling depressed, now is a great time to start belittling your friends to make yourself feel better.
Triple Mushrooms
It's not a bad thing to drink three coffees a day to stay alert, but space them out or you WILL poop your desk.
Gold Mushroom
You won't know what real speed is until you see how quickly your student loan payment sucks up your last paycheck of the month.
Bullet Bill
Life will get significantly easier for you when you figure out that the easiest way to get ahead is to cut in line.
Triple Red Shell
Those texts you sent to that special someone were dead on; sexy, playful, and enticing. Too bad you sent all of them to your mom.
King Shell
You have a knack for dead-on observations and honesty, which explains why all your friends hate you so much.
Boo
Sometimes you may feel like you're invisible, but that doesn't mean your friends won't see you stealing stuff from their houses.
